Nice Thoughts

 

 

One Moment

The moment you are in TENSION
You will lose your ATTENTION
Then you are in total CONFUSION
And you will feel IRRITATION
Then you will spoil personal RELATION
Ultimately,you won’t get C0-OPERATION
Then you will make things COMPLICATION
Then your blood pressuring raise CAUTION
And you may have to take MEDICATION
Instead,understand the SITUATION
And try to think about the SOLUTION
Many problems will be solved by DISCUSSION
This will work out better in your PROFESSION
Don’t think it’s my free SUGGESTION
It’s only for your PREVENTION
If you understand my INTENTION
You will never come again to TENSION

A Mr Bean Christmas

Mr. Bean (Rowan Atkinson) gets his hands on a nativity scene during Christmas.
The goofy yet silent screw ball then starts to act out the scene based on his version of history. Probably based more on the other toys available to his reach.
We never knew that a T-Rex was part of Christ’s birth but you never really know. It might have happened this way. Luckily the tanks were there to fend off the dinosaurs.

Virginity Check

A young man was  planning to get married and asked his doctor how he could tell if  his bride is a virgin.

The doctor  said, 'Well, you need three things. A can of red paint, a  can of blue paint and a shovel..'

The man was  astonished and asked, 'So what do I do with these?'

The doc  replied, 'Before the wedding night, you paint your one ball red and the other ball blue.   If she says, 'That's the strangest pair of balls I ever saw', you hit her head with the shovel.'

Friends Reunited

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a
party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room. Those who
remained talked about their kids.

The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a
successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and
Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and
now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave
his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday."

The second guy said, "Darn, that's terrific! My son is also my pride and
joy. He started working for a big airline, then went to flight school to
become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he
owns the majority of its assets. He's so rich that he gave his best
friend a brand new jet for his birthday."

The third man said: "Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best
universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own
construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away
something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A
30,000 square foot mansion."

The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned
from the restroom and asked: "What are all the congratulations for?" One of
the three said: "We were talking about the pride we feel for the
successes of our sons. ...What about your son?"

The fourth man replied: "My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a
stripper at a nightclub." The three friends said: "What a shame... what
a disappointment." The fourth man replied: "No, I'm not ashamed. He's my
son and I love him. And he hasn't done too badly either. His birthday
was two weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot
mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three
boyfriends."

Reason, Season, Lifetime.... :)

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring
the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season .

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime